So, you’ve found Mr. Right and you’ve been with him for awhile. Everything seems so perfect that it’s almost too good to be true. How do you keep this strong, healthy relationship going?
Understand the Love Languages
Gary Chapman, world renowned minister and author, coined a very interesting term that I believe should be the foundation of all relationships…the five love languages. When you understand what your partner’s love language is, you are better able to help him feel loved. Some men have “acts of service” as their primary love language which means that when their women do small tasks for them, they feel loved. If you know that your man loves when his dinner is cooked and the house is clean then put in the effort to ensure these needs are met. Conversely, he should also understand your love language so that he is able to fulfill what you need to feel loved. My primary love languages are “quality time” and “words of affirmation”. I really love when my man makes an effort to spend time with me….this is very important to me. I also feel loved when he tells me I’m beautiful and says things to inspire me and boost my mood. It is crucial that you both understand each other in this way so that you can meet each other’s needs to feel loved.
Whenever two people spend lots of time together and are in each other’s spaces for prolonged periods of time, there is bound to be conflict. Some couples argue while others avoid each other in order to deal with conflicts. However, I believe that the best way to deal with conflicts is to approach them calmly and talk them out. Talking them out means that you understand the need to listen to what each other is saying and not accuse each other. Using “I” statements instead of “You” statements can help to relieve the feeling of accusation. For example, instead of saying “You’re always out with your friends and you never spend time with me”, you can say “I feel neglected and lonely when you spend so much time with your friends. I feel as though you are hardly home.” Effective communication keeps a healthy relationship going.
Break any Existing Monotony
Sometimes, couples can become so comfortable that they end up taking the romance out of their relationships. Keep the flame alive by going on exciting adventures together and making time to enjoy new experiences together. Probably you can try zip lining or something else out of the norm together. You would be surprised at how these simple things can open your eyes to things you never knew about your partner and draw you closer together.
Good relationships are rare so if you have one, do everything that you can to hold on to it.